Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Testing, testing, 1,2,3

Um.............. So it's been awhile (awkward rubbing of feet together and nervous glances). Is um, well, is anyone still there?

I know there's really no excuse for not posting in so long, but really life just got complicated, and uncomplicated, and complexing and then not so complexing, it was just a little crazy.

Bottom line, I am attempting to come back. Anybody interested? Can't say I really blame you if not, I mean it have been about three months since my last post and who knows when the next will be, STRIKE THAT, the next should be fairly soon. However, I am willing to concede I may have lost some of you along the way. Oh well.

In catch up news, Mr Cranky Pants and I have had a series of ridiculous, heart breaking, infuriating, stupid fights, that we have made up about, promised not to fight about again, and then have gone and gotten into another stupid fight. Current status: Both apologetic for the fight we got into this morning. And that has been our life as a couple in a nutshell.

On the work front, well I've had better jobs.... less perks, but definitely better jobs.

The Little Monster is now potty-trained, thank you very much, and now if we could just get her into her own bed things would really be looking good!
I am WAYYYYYYYYY behind in terms of projects.

And other than that and some other silliness, life goes on you know.

Ok, this is me promising to be better.... sort of, ok really I will try...........

Monday, July 13, 2009

Oh Happy Day!

Thinking About: Decorating the Little Monster's Room
Current Mood: Content

Yup, that's right, I am very content today. No more depressed Mrs. R. Nope, she's been banished. Just happy go lucky Mrs. R singing along to "Love Song" in her office, hoping no one else can hear her, and tapping her toes to the music.

Just grooving............

Hmmm I just get into a weird funk sometimes, especially if I'm overwhelmed. It makes me all sad and tired, and it's hard to shake. But you know what, I had a great weekend, and got lots of rest, and just cleared my head.

Mr. Wonderful made another surprise appearance this weekend and let me sleep in on Saturday and Sunday; and also took the Little Monster out until late on Saturday night so I had even more time to lounge around and relax (although I was supposed to be cleaning....).

The Little Monster did a surprisingly wonderful thing yesterday by demanding she spend the night with her "weta "(wee-ta), or abuelita and wouldn't take no for an answer. She got dressed, put her shoes on, and told me to get her "packpack," aka backpack, "yuse," aka juice, and "cwar seat" into "weta's cwar." So we did it, we got her all ready, put her in the car, and fully expected her to freak out and want to stay with us as my mother in law pulled out of the driveway. Instead, she did the opposite. She contentedly watched her dvd, drank her juice, waved at us through the window, said "bye, miss you, love you" and that was that. Of course I immediately burst into tears, and cried for the next 20 (maybe I'm willing to truthfully admit 30-40) minutes, that my "baby" was gone, and it was her first sleep over, and the first time she had been away from us for the entire night. Obviously, it was much more traumatic for mommy, then baby. All reports this morning indicated that she had a great night, woke up in a great mood this morning, ate breakfast, and is busy playing with her cousin.

They grow up so fast.................. And I have a sinking feeling that this is one of many times I'm going to end up in tears as she continues to grow and amaze me. Sigh. Which is why getting overwhelmed comes easier than I'd like it to.

I think it's just easy as mothers, wives, daughters, friends to get so wrapped up in everything and everyone else, you just forget about you. I need that break, that step backward to just slow down. Let my thoughts rest, turn the little voice inside my head off, and do nothing.

Speaking of doing nothing, I have not gotten to any of the many sewing projects I wanted to do, and I don't think I'll be able to get to it this week either, as we are doing a major clean up in order to get ready to get some new furniture this weekend. The Little Monster got a "big girl" bed set, and we've been needing a new headboard and foot board for our bedroom, and a new couch for our family room, so we found a great deal at a local furniture store, qualified for financing (yay), and are anxiously awaiting the new arrivals. In the meantime, I had to totally clean out the Little Monster's room (our extra storage space), and empty out the old furniture which I'm giving to Mrs. S for the Little Brat. It's actually really good furniture, I've had it since I was a little girl!

Friday is also Mr. Wonderful's birthday and all the family is getting together for dinner, and then hanging out at our house Saturday. It should be fun, and maybe I can start my sewing projects then. I've got a ton of them to do!

I'm excited to see Mrs S too. We've been talking (and when I say talking, I mostly mean texting) about getting stressed out and overwhelmed lately, and how we should handle it and get over it, as if we could really get over it. (Hahaha)

We've concluded that we need to do the following:
1. Have more girl's nights out!
2. Pray more
3. Take deep breaths
4. Count.... ahhh counting.....
5. Don't sweat the small stuff (which, as a secret control freak, is ridiculously hard for me to do!)
6. Vent to each other
7. Laugh

We need to just laugh more often. What else is there when everything else goes wonky, but to just laugh.

Today is a great day. I am super excited to redecorate the Little Monster's Big Girl Room, and make it a a welcoming and safe haven for her to just relax, but more importantly, to give her a space that's really hers, and that she loves.

I'm hoping it's a great week..... I'll definitely keep you "posted."

Happy Monday to All!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

A Little Tenderness

"She may be weary,
Women do get weary, wearing the same shabby dress
And When she's weary, try a little tenderness

She may be waiting,
Just anticipating, things she may never possess
While she's without them
Try a little tenderness"

(Try A Little Tenderness, Michael Buble)

Well ladies, and gents that's how I've been feeling lately. And yes, you need to read between the lines in order to fully understand the beauty of the song. I am weary, I feel weighted down with all the inexplicable, unexplainable things that life throws at you. The last minute curve balls, that you never see coming.

It is a rather dour mood you find me in today. This morning I had news that my oldest cousin is in the ICU as his father could not wake him up this morning. He suffers from Myasthenia gravis, as his mother did, and also has some mental handicaps as well.

I feel rather depressed. Maybe it's too close together, losing my grandmother, and my cousin falling ill, too close together, and I find myself totally unprepared. Sometimes I feel lost amid the chaos of life, and I'm not sure what my next step will be, let alone where to put my foot.

I was texting Mrs. S this morning about how we need more romance in our lives. Actually, maybe just a little tenderness. Seriously....

Hmm... my mind is just wandering all over the place, and so is this post. I think I'll just sign off at this point, and leave you with the best part of the song............

"It's not just sentimental,
She has her grief and her cares,
But a word, so soft and gentle,
Makes it easier to bear

You won't regret it
Women don't forget it
Love is their whole happiness

And it's oh so easy
Try a little tenderness"

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

A funeral and a flight

It has been forever since my last post, and in the span of forever, I'm sure you can guess a lot has gone on!

Sad news first--> my grandmother passed away on June 16th. She was 92 and had numerous heath ailments so we all knew it was coming, but it was still a pretty big shock.

The next day, on June 17th, my husband, daughter and I got on a plane to Portland, Oregon, to help my sister (let's call her the Flower) get moved into an apartment because she starts school on July 6th! Originally it was supposed to be my parents going with her but with my grandmother's passing we had to step in and pitch hit at the last possible minute.

Yes, it was a small tornado of activities to get ready in one day's notice, and something I hope I never have to do again! Also did I mention my sister's boyfriend came with us?

The flight to Portland was ok. We took a puddle hopper from one major international airport to another major international airport, which required going to a separate terminal via bus, which is really fun to do while carrying a sleeping child, her backpack, your own bag, and keeping an eye on your husband, your sister and her boyfriend so you all make it to the same destination at the same time without getting lost, and so that you don't wake up the sleeping monster, and also so that the two lovebirds don't have time to find a spot to ahem, err, "nest" if you catch my drift. The flight from second said international airport to Portland much better, seeing as how we didn't have to walk onto the tarmac to get to the plane.

Getting the Flower moved in was Ok. It could have been much better, faster, and easier if her boyfriend had not been present. What else can you expect from two teenagers that are so desperately in love that one of them had to come and move the other one into their school apartment, other than absolute ridiculousness. They were soooo distracted, and sooooo wrapped up in themselves and their own little world, getting them to do anything was like getting my two year old to put her clothes on in the morning--- basically impossible. In the end, my husband, my poor Mr. Cranky Pants and I did the majority of the work while resisting the urge to throw both kids over the balcony.

After the Flower's boyfriend left, we all settled in a bit more, and really enjoyed Portland. It is so beautiful there! I would love to go back.

We flew back home on Saturday, this time non-stop and that was fun and easy. Since we've been back I've had a million things to do to get our lives back in order, and you know what, I haven't done one of them! Hahahaha. Ok but seriously I haven't. Just can't bring myself to do it, call it just got back from a last minute non vacation and I don't know what to do know itis.

I do have to got to work though, and as of Tuesday I lost my babysitters.... so the little monster has come with me to the office, which is ok since there's only three of us here anyway. She's been about as helpful as a two year old can be.

In other news, Mrs. S and family are coming to stay this weekend, and it will be so nice to catch up and have some fun! We're going to the fair!

Also, Happy Fourth of July!

Phew.... that's about as much catch up as I can come up with for today, back to our regularly scheduled programming tomorrow!

Mrs. R

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Make You Feel My Love

So if you've been following this blog (which I know you have), you know that Mr. Cranky Pants and I have had our ups and downs lately, well actually just a lot of downs. I am happy to report though, that since the fight with Mr. Idiot, Mr. Cranky Pants and I have not had any more super nova melt downs.

Insert huge sigh of relief here!

I know it seems a like a small thing, but it's monumental to me and I am so thankful that that rough ride is over. In fact, since getting into it with Mr. Idiot, Mr. Cranky Pants and I have been that much closer, that much more supportive, and that much more loving. It's wonderful.

It's like our honeymoon phase all over again.

There's flowers and little birds everywhere. Ok, well not really, but it's been pretty darn awesome. And maybe that's the point. Every relationship needs to go through its ups and downs, especially the downs, in order to truly appreciate what you have.

I mean don't get me wrong. I love and appreicate Mr. Cranky Pants so much, but since we've gone through and over our obstacles, it's just so much more real, so much easier to put my finger on, just so.much.more. And I love it.

So today is a short post, and more griping about the Little Monster, my undone projects, my projects in progress, and life in general later. I'll just leave you with the lyrics to these songs... perfect for my feelings about Mr. Cranky Pants lately. Also on my playlist, Hey There Delilah, 1234, Chasing Pavements, Lucky, My Funny Valentine, Til There Was You.....

MAKE YOU FEEL MY LOVE (originally written by Bob Dylan, but check out Adele's version)

When the rain
Is blowing in your face
And the whole world
Is on your case
I could offer you
A warm embrace
To make you feel my love

When the evening shadows
And the stars appear
And there is no one there
To dry your tears
I could hold you
For a million years
To make you feel my love

I know you
Haven't made
Your mind up yet
But I would never
Do you wrong
I've known it
From the moment
That we met
No doubt in my mind
Where you belong

I'd go hungry
I'd go black and blue
I'd go crawling
Down the avenue
No, there's nothing
That I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love

The storms are raging
On the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
Though winds of change
Are throwing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing
Like me yet

I could make you happy
Make your dreams come true
Nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends
Of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love

HALO (by Beyonce, I know know, it's Beyonce)

Remember those walls I built
Well, baby they're tumbling down
And they didn't even put up a fight
They didn't even make up a sound
I found a way to let you in
But I never really had a doubt
Standing in the light of your halo
I got my angel now

It's like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
It's the risk that I'm takin'
I ain't never gonna shut you out

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo

Hit me like a ray of sun
Burning through my darkest night
You're the only one that I want
Think I'm addicted to your light
I swore I'd never fall again
But this don't even feel like falling
Gravity can't forget
To pull me back to the ground again

Feels like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
The risk that I'm takin'
I'm never gonna shut you out
Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace

Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your faceBaby
I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
Halo, halo

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo

I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo
I can feel your halo halo halo
I can see your halo halo halo

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

What We Lose When Time Flies.........

My Goodness and my goodness! The last two weeks have been so intense, it's left me without any time to sit down and vent, er, ahem, I mean blog. Things have just been coming at me at left and right, and once I wrangle one item, another one popped up just a quick!

Here is the Reader's Digest recap of my past two weeks:

1. Get the Little Monster's teeth fixed

2. Have Mrs. S and family plus my in-laws over for the weekend

3. Recooperate from the weekend

4. Pull my hair out trying to get Mrs. S b-day suprise finished on time

5. Fight with Mr. Cranky Pants

6. Arrange a Girl's Nite Out (GNO) for me and Mrs. S

7. Fight with Mr. Cranky Pants

8. Go crazy at work

9. Fight with Mr. Cranky Pants

10. Have a humongous blow-out with my dad, Mr. Idiot

11. Have a humongous blow-out with Mr. Cranky Pants about the blow-out with Mr. Idiot

12. Realize that the Little Monster somehow lost one her $190 teeth (tooths, however you say it)

13. Have a mini melt down because of said missing tooth and numbers 10 and 11

14. Finished Mrs. S b-day present

15. Planned activities for the kiddios to do with their daddies while Mrs. S and I ran away to the circus, er, ahem had GNO.

16. Finally had GNO with Mrs. S, and we'll have to do it again, and soon!

17. Attempted to make up with Mr. Idiot, with minimal success

18. Got into another huge fight with Mr. Cranky Pants at his parent's home

19. Made up with Mr. Cranky Pants

20. Updating my blog..........

PHEW, are you as exhuasted as I am from reading this list?! It's been intense. Really intense. But things seem to be straightening themselves out now, but it's a miracle that I made it this far. It has just been two weeks that has taken everything I've had emotionally, and mentally to make it through. And with any trying time in your life, I have lost things, and gained things, made difficult decsions, and easy ones. I'm sure the insight of the past events won't even truly hit me until years from now, but boy oh boy, do I ever feel years older.

Things I've lost.... respect. I love Mr. Idiot, more than I should, more than I need to, and I honor him and my mother everyday, all the time. That said, I do not respect him anymore. This is a monumental thing for me. I realized I could finally separate the two. I have lost all respect for Mr. Idiot because of the things he's done to me and my family (Mr. Cranky Pants and the Little Monster). I thought that part of honoring your parents was respecting them no matter what, but that's not the case. Honoring your parents is loving them no matter what, respect is a two way street. I'm tired of giving and never getting. I mean a post about Mr. Idiot is really another blog in and of itself, so let's just leave it at that!

Things I've gained.... humility. With a stronger sense of who I am, and not being chained down by certain emotional bonds, I overstepped my boundaries with Mr. Cranky Pants. I made an inappropriate comment about a heated topic, and all hell just broke loose. I wasn't willing to give in and neither was he, and it was pretty ridiculously stupid. Pride is a terrible thing when used the wrong way.... I finally saw the hurtfulness in what I said, and have repented, and learned that a little humility goes a very long way.................

Ok, so I don't want this post to be a total downer........ let's skip ahead to some of the more fun things I've done.

GNO---> AWESOME. It was totally the best pick me up ever! Mrs. S and I just had mani/pedi's and dinner, then went back to my house to chat it up, all night! hahahah, also we had drinks, and so it was pretty much an all around rocking night. Maybe next time we'll shut up enough to watch a movie or do a craft hahahaha.......... but I doubt it. The next day I played dress-up with Mrs. S and my clothes that don't fit my fat ass anymore hahaha, to help her get ready to go to a wedding later that day. Let me just say that Mrs. S turned out simply stunning, and I know she had a great time. Mrs. S also gave me a fabulous hair cut... all in all an stellar weekend!

And the beginning of this week has been hard, but I'm not going to dwell on that or the Little Monster's missing tooth. No sir, not me. Instead, I am going to plan my next GNO, and go home and have a drink!

The biggest thing we lose when time flies is ourselves. Mommy needs a time out and a maragarita.

Friday, May 22, 2009

A Hodge Podge Really

So, it took me a week to get to my second post... tsk tsk tsk. Well, it's been a very busy week, and as it comes to a close I am doing mental leaps for joy!

I am EXHAUSTED. Really truly just tired. The past few weeks have been action packed, filled to the gills, not a spare moment anywhere. I am looking forward to a long weekend where I just sit on my behind and do nothing. Well almost nothing.

I do need to get the house in order, catch up on laundry, mop the floor, reorganize our family room, clean out the bedroom, fix the dog's bed (thank you Pio Pico for chewing it up), go grocery shopping, and so on and so forth. Phew! But I am planning on doing all that junk tomorrow, and leave my Sunday and Monday wide open........ for blissful nothingness.

I haven't even gotten to my projects for this week. SIGH. I know, I need to get on it! But I've been too tired to get to it after the Little Monster goes to bed. Just one thing after the other you know.

Plus, in our continued growth, Mr. Cranky Pants and I decided to keep the fighting spirit alive the rest of the week as well. (Eyeroll please........) So, I am hoping that we can keep civil the rest of the weekend!

I am in desparate need of a GNO (Girl's Night Out) where all sorts of madness and tomfoolery will take place. I need shed Mr. Cranky Pants and the Little Monster and just let loose! So, if you know of a great GNO place, and would like to partake, let me know! I'll be there with bells on!

In my observation and report analysis of this week, I've come to the conclusion that it takes a loooooooonnnnnnnngggggggggg time to grow up. Seriously, to be a mature adult, who can make rational level headed decisions, to keep your emotions in check, to be the bigger person, it takes forever and ever, and it's something I'm still working on.....and Mrs. S too... and something that someone else we know and love to death better get her butt in gear and get to gettin also............I wonder why the transition from being a child to becoming and adult is so hard.......

Lots of emotional baggage you need to dump on the way.....

Ok philosophical moment: Over.

Have a safe and Happy Memorial Day weekend, and if you drink any good drinks, have a second one for me!

Mrs. R